The inevitable 'review of the year' post

Being New Year's Eve, I had to write the inevitable 'review of the year' post really.

Towards the end of 2012, it was pretty good as we'd just got married. However, spoiling our honeymoon period a little, I lost my job last December. This led to my depression going from mild to moderate/severe, which (of course) led to compulsive overeating. I gained back almost all of the stone I'd lost in 2012 (a 12lb gain, to be exact) over about 3 months.

So I was feeling pretty useless last winter, but thankfully an opportunity to do some admin for a carers' charity came up. This helped me to feel rather less useless, gave me some good work experience and (most importantly) helped them out for a few months.

In feeling better about myself I was able to start losing some weight again. As summer rolled round, the work at the charity dried up, but by then I was back on the Fluoxetine (an antidepressant) so I was able to continue feeling better.

In July, I did a course in employability and computer skills - something else to boost my self-esteem. That was months ago and I'm still not in work, but the ECDL qualification should help me to get something eventually.

Talking of self-esteem, perhaps the best thing for my mental health this year has been the Self-Esteem group  I've attended (run by the NHS). Knowing that other people feel a similar way to me, and having a structured course and good advice from the ladies who ran it on how to work on not feeling like that, has been very helpful. The course was largely based on a book called Overcoming Low Self-Esteem. I made some good friends on that course, who I hope to continue seeing.

I can't say I'm fixed quite yet, but I'm getting there! My new year's resolutions are about working towards getting better, and getting my life back on track.

The main life-back-on-track resolution is to get a job. Rather more easily said than done, but essential for my mental health and my husband's.

I also want to lose at least a stone, perhaps even a stone and a half (21lbs) to get to my goal weight. To get to a size 12 in 2014 would be a nice achievement.

Another resolution is to continue to work on my mental health. To be kinder yet firmer with myself in working towards improving my life.

I'd also like to be more creative in 2014, so I've started a new art journal. Not in a diary like previous years, so no pressure to record every day. I intend to draw/write something as often as I can though, whether it is a positive affirmation, an emotional rant or just a doodle.

At my heaviest this year, I weighed 11st 4lbs (in March I think), and at my last weigh-in of the year (20th Dec) I weighed 10st 1lb - a loss of 1st 3lbs (17lbs) in 2013. If I can have a similar loss in 2014, I'll be very close to my goal! Dread to to think what I weigh after the Christmas eating and drinking though ...

Happy New Year to anyone who might be reading this. We'll be spending it with Big Bang Theory and wine. Here's to a 2014 full of possibilities! 

Nearly halfway there!

So, after a couple of months of ups and downs, I've got down to the lowest weight I've been since I started Weight Watchers. I lost 1/2lb this week, taking me down to 10st 9.5lb, which is a loss of 26lbs (1st 11.5lb) so far, woo. I have just 2.5lbs to go until I'm halfway there, and will have lost 2st of the 4 I decided to lose when I started in February 2010. I should be able to lose those 2.5lbs in a couple of weeks - fingers crossed!

Want these shoes for my wedding!

I've bought my wedding dress (well, my Mum has anyway!) since I last posted, in a size smaller than I currently am. I'd love to be a size 12 (1st 2.5lbs (16.5lbs) to go) for my wedding day in the Autumn, though I'd still be happy with being on the slim end of size 14. I think size 14 is a more realistic goal! I'd have to have my dress taken in if I get any slimmer than that - not that that would be a bad thing at all :) Now I just need to get my shoes, jewellery, hair accessories ...

Image from Elle

I will have to treat myself to something nice once I reach that size 14 milestone. The shops are starting to get their Autumn ranges in, so it would be good to get me some new season clothes. Disappointing British summers tend to make me want to just skip this season altogether and go straight to Autumn. Fashion magazines start talking about A/W trends about now, and I get impatient to start wearing new things - nice jackets and such. Looks like there will be some decent military/utility jackets around this season - I do like this one from Burberry Prorsum, and their little bow belts - perfect for showing off the tiny little waist that I will have! I do like a bit of velvet too, which looks like it's coming back for A/W - a good incentive for slimming back into my size 14 velvet dresses. Though I'll probably end up going geek chic in a big knit like I usually do. At least I'll be on-trend!

A little treat

A half a pound weight loss this week, and 2.5lbs off last week, means that I now only have 3.5lbs to go until I'm 10st 7lb, halfway to goal, and a size 14. I've been planning for a while that I would treat myself to a few new clothes once I got to size 14, and this week I couldn't wait. I like to give myself some little non-food treats sometimes when I've lost weight, and Friday just happened to be payday. So I went to New Look straight after my meeting, saw some purple skinnies and tried them on. Size 14, and they zipped right up. So I had to have them.

I've been wearing a few 14s lately anyway - I wear a size 14 skirt to work most days. Won't be long til I've lost the 3.5lbs and I'm 'officially' a size 14! The jeans will fit better then, lol. It took me about 6 months to drop my first dress size, but that was nearly two years ago, so I've been waiting a long time for this! I have the wedding to motivate me now though, so I will get there, and beyond to size 12.

I have 1st 3.5lbs (17.5lbs) to go until I'm 9st 7lb, and a size 12. If I want to be there for the wedding, I have 17.5lbs to lose in 24 weeks. I can do it!

Wedding Weight Loss

Something borrowed, something blue, something old and a slim new you.

Nicked that from a Slimming World ad. Cheesy, but I quite like it :)

So we finally have a venue for our wedding, and therefore a definite date. I was thinking that knowing the date meant that, if I want to be at goal for the wedding, I'd have to lose 33lbs in 29 weeks. Which might be doable, but I don't think I need to lose that much to be a size 12 bride. If a stone is a dress size, I would only need to lose about 20lbs to get there (at about 9st 7lb) in time. Which I can definitely do.

I've lost a few more pounds since I last posted, taking me down to 10st 12lb at my last weigh-in on the 6th of April. Great to be back under 11st, although Easter and then visiting the family last Saturday mean that I haven't lost since then. Time off is fun sometimes though :) Next challenge is my 30th birthday next weekend ...